I have something to admit. Some of you may know that may parents grew up in Brooklyn. In fact, they lived right down the street from each other. During the 70's there was a mass exodus of my family which resulted in family in California, Texas, Atlanta, Chicago, Virginia, Connecticut....basically all over.
What I wasn't aware of what that my dad had a couple relatives that were left behind. And they lived in Staten Island.
dum Dum DUM.
When my dad arrived on Friday for a quick visit in NYC for the weekend, he informed me that he was going to see said cousin(s) on Sunday and asked if I wanted to go. Of course I didn't. I can talk to anyone in a bar, or any peer (pier!) of mine, but throw me in someone else's house who is 50 years older than me, and I clam up. I'd rather have my fingernails pulls out one by one then spend the day with old people.
So I did what any non-confrontational person would do in my position--I let my dad decide. Now, occasionally in a blue moon, he'll see that I don't want to do something and just let me be, but this time upon asking if he wanted me to go, he simply shrugged and said, "Sure!" Looking back, I don't think it was so much as him wanting me to meet his relatives, but rather him not wanting to be alone with them for hours.
So off we went...to Staten Island. And we wouldn't even be able to hit any clubs. Dammit!
We crossed the Verrazano Bridge into Staten Island around 2:30 pm. I was greeted with a tanning booth on every corner, along with gas stations. Lots and lots of gas stations. For about 3 miles we were behind a car with specialized license plates that said, "MikeMissU" surrounded by a plate frame what had the kid's DOB and DOD on it along with the phrase, "Our angel in Heaven. Always looking out for us. Always and forever" or some shit like that. If that wasn't enough of a tribute, they had a bumper sticker of the kid's face on the window again with his DOB and DOD in case we forgot. And of course the kid was wearing a homey hat in the picture.
So eventually we depart from Mikey's family and arrive at my dad's cousin's house. Prior to our arrival, my dad informed me that his cousin was 71, and has a son that "may or may not" have been in a car accident. Uh....ok....
We ring the doorbell, and there is a short (shorter than me), rather round (to say it nicely), bald (bald as my dad and that is saying something) around the age of 40-45 blankly staring back at us. My dad was confused for a second, thinking it was his actual cousin until his actual cousin screamed at the back of the house. Turns out the gentleman that opened the door was my dad's cousin's son. Or my 2nd cousin. And he didn't take his eyes off of me.
When he finally spoke 3 minutes after I entered the door and introduced myself, his words were, "My you're a pretty girl." And then I knew what kinda day this was gonna be.
Turns out my dad's cousin was kinda awesome. And so was his wife. We had some big Italian home cooked dinner which was delicious, which was only spoiled by the fact my 2nd cousin would only talk to me the entire meal. But it wasn't actual conversations. He would interrupt his father's discussion about he and my dad's childhood to pepper me with questions like:
Where do you live, Megan?
Do you have a cell phone, Megan?
Have you ever been to this theater, Megan?
What kind of music do you like, Megan?
What's your favorite movie, Megan?
In between courses of dinner, 2nd cousin went to get his gee-tar. When I told him I liked classic rock (shutup), he immediately got out his guitar to play "Here Comes the Sun" for "everyone". When he was done, we'd all politely clap and he would bow his head graciously, hold up his hand, and mutter thank you--and then look at me.
This went on all night and I was increasingly getting uncomfortable. I thought maybe he was just nice, and I was being paranoid, but when I went to leave, he asked me what I was doing this weekend and told me he would be right in my neighborhood. I told him that was awesome, and that I have friends in town so enjoy my neighborhood alone (that's actually the truth, Hellafied is coming!). He kept on inching towards me getting closer and closer. Then, his father had to say, "OK [name redacted], that's enough." And then we left.
As soon as we got in the car, my dad said "Wow, I think he liked you."
Yeah, no shit Dad! He went on stating he has never witnessed a guy fawning over his youngest like that, to which I had to remind him THAT HE WAS MY FUCKING COUSIN.
His only response was a chuckle as he told me thruogh the laughter, "I can't wait til your sisters hear about this. He might not get girls like you coming his way very often."
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