My triathlon training is not going so hot. Ask me why. No, go 'head. ASK ME.
I have Swimmer's Ear.
No, really.
My outer ear is infected from swimming, and I am in horrible pain. I have a pretty high tolerance as I didn't even shed a tear when my tonsils were fucking bleeding 2 years ago, but this? THIS SUCKS.
I can't close my mouth all the way as my jaw is all out of whack and not lining up. Every time I force it closed, my inner ear moves which sends a shooting pain down my body. Today I tried to step into a Slim Jim as a snack, and I almost passed out from pain.
I went to the doctor today and he was all "Oh" when he looked in my ear. He then began to dig around further WITH HIS INSTRUMENT OF TORTURE which almost brought me to tears. His only response was, "yeah, it's infected. You have a whole bunch of white fluid [I can only guess what this is] in your ear. I'm giving you drops."
So I'm in a horrible fucking mood, and it hurts to smile.
Happy 5th of May.
Topic of comment discussion: Slim Jim's: God's gift to humans or the Devil's tasty pitch fork? Discuss.
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16 comments:
OUCH. Ear infections are right up there with toothaches. Very painful.
I once had an earache and noted that I was on the exact same antibiotic as my dog...who also had an ear infection.
I hope the drops help. Don't drink them.
anything to put me out of my misery.
Do you have a cell phone, Megan?
You have a whole bunch of white fluid [I can only guess what this is] in your ear.
Use better protection.
Rise and shine Big Pimpin' -- it's Jimmy Shaker Day!
jhc-
Cute. Very cute.
crimenotes-
Agreed. Before Jason comes at me with a bag of Ruffles.
j shaker-
Dude, Jimmy Shaker Day was last week. Keep up.
I wonder if today is Jimmy Shaker Day.
I had that once and it sucks, and the antibiotics didn't work - but someone told me to mix vinegar and water (warm) and leave it in there for about 10 minutes a few times a day and that worked better than the drugs. I rarely advocate against drugs, but in this case it worked.
Advice from a long time competitive swimmer. Buy a bottle of swim ear drops at the local drug store and put them in each ear after every swim. Problem solved. Lake water is much worse and since you are a triathlete sooner or later you will be swimming in some dirty lake.
sorry about the ear... ouch.
but on an oh-so happy note, i love me
some mechanically separated chicken parts
forced into a sheath of pleasure. yum.
Totally the Devil's [nasty] pitchfork!
Swimmer's ear hurts like a bitch... but the good news is that it typically goes away pretty quickly once you start the drops. More bad news? Sometimes the drops are a little sting-y. But, again, the torture ends relatively soon after it begins.
Hope you feel better SOON!!! :)
one word: painkillers. Get 'em. Use 'em.
I've been researching some folk remedies on your behalf. Some advice:
1.) Drink heavily. This will numb the pain.
2.) Stick straws up nose; fall down. This will loosen the infection.
3.) Lick a strange coffee pot. This will make the infection jealous.
4.) Speak very loudly. This will make the infection want to go someplace quiet.
5.) Extract infection from ear using hybrid vibrator/sexy knife. By now, infection will be anxious to leave and will exit with a little prodding.
6.) Repeat steps 1-5 as needed.
Or as Meg calls it - "Friday".
Honestly, though. Drops of alcohol on q-tips after you swim. EVERY TIME you swim. Trust me. Even if you don't like me, trust me.
I was going to make the same suggestion sam did. Those swim ear drops work great.
Sorry your tri training has been temporarily de-railed, and even sorrier about the pain I know comes along with swimmers ear. Actually, I'd love to see a few more posts about the training itself (but maybe I'm in the minority there). It's nice to see the perspective of someone else doing a triathlon. 'Course, I'm not currently training for anything in particular ... I'm going to wait to get back into until AFTER I squeeze this human out of my va-jay-jay.
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